The Community Word

She tells me why being a priority to people she loves is very important to her. We discuss how even among the busiest people, and isn’t everyone busy these days, it’s hoped they’ll find time to make us a priority in their lives. I love reflective conversations with my adult children. Sometimes I can still lead in a traditional parental role, and other times they are marvelous teachers, helping me sort out diverse perspectives and alternatives to enhance my life.

With one son and two daughters now in their ’30’s, it’s slightly easier to remain objective. I no longer feel the need to assume the “Mom” position. They share details of their lives with me, interesting discussions ensue, and I offer my thoughts without feeling responsible for outcomes. Probably now more than ever, I hope and pray for positive results. My children are adults with concerns typically more serious. But they are resourceful people and I trust their judgment. Still, everyone, regardless of age, education or street smarts, needs concerned family and friends for bouncing ideas around.

This idea of being a priority to others jostles my awareness. Do I treat the people most important to me as priorities or might they sometimes feel like I’ve merely worked them into my schedule? No one wants to be “worked in.” We want to matter, enough to know the calendar’s cleared and plans are made with great anticipation.

Children and canines excel at giving devoted attention to loved ones. Granted, they aren’t worried about finances or personal obligations, or even dinner preparations. They seem to know instinctively how to give their undivided attention and make it count. We can learn from them.

Busy, scheduled adults that we are, we’ve concluded our holiday obligations and delivered our Valentines, (such a charming day to remember people just because we want to and not because we have to. A perfect time for making loved ones a priority.) We’re likely still shoveling snow and slush, and now we’re hearing about Easter. Pastors and preachers often lament that worship is not always a priority to folks in their congregation. Some people base their church-going decision on feelings. “If I feel like going, I will. Otherwise, next week.” And next week turns into twice a year, if they feel like it.

We don’t want others to make time for us only if they feel like it or there’s nothing better to do. While we can’t know the mind of God, it’s likely God’s in agreement with us on this one. The people most important to us, like the activities we value, should rank first in our lives. If we don’t accomplish everything on our to do list, it’s okay because we’ve given our attention to the most important.

It’s often said that at life’s end what we’ll regret most are not the things we did, not even the mistakes we made, but what we didn’t do. Time moves rapidly, and always numerous details, some very worthwhile, are clamoring for our attention. In the final analysis, it’s people who matter the most. People, particularly those we love and who love us, are life’s priorities. The choice of how to spend our time is a personal decision, one that should cause us to really consider our priorities.