Do We Survive or Celebrate?

Flipping through December issues of monthly magazines suggests contradictory approaches to the holidays. “Survive” headlines one magazine, “celebrate” another. Such different ways of considering the same event. In an effort to respect diversity and individualism, we struggle even with what to call that period of time from the day after Thanksgiving to December 26th. About Thanksgiving, what happened to giving that valuable day equal time with other seasonal events? It’s one of the purest of holidays; no gift giving required and no controversy about its name. Such a wonderful opportunity for taking the time to reflect on blessings and give thanks.

This year, in response to growing concern that spending won’t meet retailers’ expectations, the focus is more on Friday bargains and less on gratitude. Black Friday, not such a festive name, receives more press than Thanksgiving.

So the question lingers, do we survive or celebrate? Perhaps the first item on the agenda is to reduce expectations. Regardless of religious beliefs, or maybe in part because of them, we should realize the holiday season, with all its glitz and glimmer, is not a time of perfection. Actually, perfection exists only in the magazines and our imaginations. And if we expect perfect gifts, parties, and family gatherings, we’ll be sorely disappointed. Maybe all the talk about downsizing and cutting back, even though it’s typically in regard to finances and expenditures, is appropriate for holiday celebrations.

And then there’s the name, Christmas. It’s not intended to be exclusive. Wishing others “Merry Christmas” is including them in an event that began as an outpouring of love. We can be respectful and acknowledge that not everyone shares the same beliefs, but we can still honor our personal convictions.

And about those gift lists that we strive so diligently to follow. Somewhere among waiting in line at 5:00 a.m. and wrapping and hiding said item, and spending more than we should, and discovering the coveted gadget is further reduced five days before Christmas, and learning later three other people bought the same gift for the same person, necessitating the recipient stand in line the day after Christmas to try and return two duplicates, we’ve lost the magic.

Simplicity seems to be making a comeback, not because the trendsetters have decided its worth, but economics is making it more of a necessity. Christmas doesn’t have to be an extravaganza that costs countless dollars and months of time. If three days of non-stop decorating is a person’s preference, so be it. If it isn’t, no one needs to suffer from guilt or feelings of inadequacy. If shopping at 4:00 a.m. is fun, let the good times roll. If it isn’t, don’t do it.

Obviously respect for others and their preferences is needed, and kindness is always required. Generosity is important, and not just with dollars and cents, but with compliments, offers of help, and the desire to make a difference. Beyond that, viva’ la difference!

The spirit of Christmas is ours to share and enhance. The much-celebrated December holiday is not an endurance test or a contest to see who’s the most creative. It’s the season of love and good will, and it invites us to respond individually and thoughtfully.

May your celebration be wonderful! Merry Christmas!!