SANDRA DEMPSEY POST

According to the calendar I’ve kept for decades, my high school graduation was 55 years ago. More precisely it was on Wednesday, June 1, 1966 that my classmates and I walked down the aisle of St. Mary’s Cathedral as students, and later that evening walked out the door as graduates. I remember being thrilled and eager to move on to all the excitement I believed that being 18 years old, and a high school graduate would bring me. My education was fresh in my mind, and I like to think I was grateful, but worldly I was not. Being naive was a concern then and one I continue addressing.

There is a definite difference between knowing something and embracing the knowledge. I’ve never forgotten when I graduated, but it doesn’t always register in my mind just how long ago that was. As someone who wasn’t blessed with much self-confidence, I still sometimes shudder at social errors and awkward moments that happened in the past. It really wasn’t until my three oldest grandchildren turned 15 within three months of each other that I realized how young 15 is and how mistakes made at that age are common and to be expected. Accountability is necessary, and amends often need to be made regardless of the guilty person’s youth, but forgiveness and understanding can still be granted.

One of many blessings of growing older is the wonderful enjoyment of reconnecting with former classmates and becoming friends. Sometimes the best friendships develop years after the first introduction. We’ve realized by then the individual who seemed to thrive with everything in perfect order was likely as insecure as most of us. He or she just knew more about hiding or masking insecurities. It’s also interesting to learn many years later, something we should have known at the time, that things aren’t always as they seem. Eventually we recognize that the person we may have envied for his or her confidence and talent was just as apprehensive as we were. And sadly some of those who seemed so sure of themselves were often full of insecurities that no one knew anything about.

Growing older is a time for forgiveness, kindness, and a firm sense of “it’s never too late.” It really isn’t although some activities might need modification for personal safety. Skiing lessons in your ’70’s may be risky, but there’s an abundance of other activities that promote health and longevity. By now we’ve surely learned life is about learning how to gracefully adapt and move on. No, we can’t recapture our youth, but we can celebrate the joys in our present situation and look for opportunities ahead.

It’s fun to look back and see how far we’ve come. We also need to take action. Call that friend from years ago and extend a luncheon invitation. Send a handwritten note to someone who made a difference in your life. Express your gratitude and admiration to people you see regularly in your community. Volunteer your time in an organization, church, or place where you feel you’d like to play an active role.

If your past isn’t to your liking, no matter how long ago it was, change direction. The beginning isn’t as important or rewarding as how you finish.